Thee Oh Sees latest album 'A Weird Exits' is pretty cool and there is no finer way to kick-start a working day than with 'Plastic Plant' a psych workout with a humming bassline...
I'm still suffering with lower back pain, though just to be awkward it's now on the left hand side rather than the right. The answer is movement and (prescription/over the counter) drugs. I'm planning to get in touch with friends and family for chats, doing the usual boring chores, hopefully going for a brief walk and reading at least some of the papers. Just before midday I managed to have a chat with my big sister (she will forever be thus-named), which was good. It's strange that as family shrinks, you get closer to those that remain. Over the past decade or so, I've been closer to both my sisters than ever before. We grew up almost as distant planets from one another and from our parents, to some extent, though we do have shared memories, good and bad. The sun appears to be coming out and so is my washing. After lunch I called a close family friend who is godmother to son #2 and we had a long chat about life and agreed to meet up soon. It's been a while ...
I could write a lot today, but I am not planning to. Why am I bothering to write at all, you may ask? Purely because of the date. The twenty-ninth of February only comes every four years (yes, I know there are exceptions to that rule - I have written code to deal with that in the past), when it's a leap year. I feel, for no apparent reason, I should mark this day with some words. It's starting to look a lot like E's decline has plateaued and we (the Sue Ryder nurse, maybe GP) may well decide to change the way medication is delivered. We'll not stop giving her medication to reduce the likelihood of seizures, nor will we stop the pain-relief medication because I think everyone that knows agrees there is no turning back from that. Respite. That's what I need, though as yet it's not easy to arrange. Maybe that will become a possibility next week. Within the family, we've been having lots of discussions about the end and how we want it to be, and where we ...
Great start to the day! Not! Despite various stretching exercises over the weekend, I have not managed to shift my lower back pain. I think I injured it a few days ago when I helped the early morning carer (when there is only one) move my wife and in the process broke two golden rules about lifting. So now I pay the price - that'll teach me. The main consequence of the lower back pain, apart from the pain itself, is that I can't do yoga. I've tried a few forward folds and it ain't good. Damn! I shall really miss it today, though hopefully I can take a class on another day in the week, assuming I keep up the stretches and exercises and get it better. It's also put paid to my press ups and weight lifts as I don't want to aggravate it further. Usually I try and ignore it and make it worse - one thing yoga has taught me is to be a bit more in touch with how my body feels, so I don't wreck it. (Apparently there are no spares as it's a discontinued model)...
For about a week, maybe more, I've had a cold. It's one of those colds that refuses to go quickly. I have shared it widely, unintentionally, though of course, I may not be the source of all the colds, there are so many about. I'm not here to write about my cold, though. It's a lead-in to something more pernicious. Accompanying the cold, especially as it slowly fades, I've had a bad headache. Initially, I thought it was cold-related, but I've come to believe it's a physical manifestation of stress - a topic that opens a crate of cans of worms. The stress I'm experiencing is probably the result of several things I'm anxious about. I had considered listing the things I thought were at the root of it, and then deciding whether they belong in the category of things I can control or cannot control. Instead, I've decided to dig deeper and write about it in the hope that writing it down helps control it and maybe it helps more widely. I've always b...
I have a lot to talk about today, though I'm not sure how to begin. Problem solved. It's a strange time at the moment. A lot of the positive, life-enhancing things I've been enjoying are on hold. E's condition is keeping me here, apart from brief excursions for a few hours or less. Although she's on constant pain relief and calming/anti-seizure medication, there are things going on, intermittently. As I am the main communication medium that attempts to interpret signs that mean she is in pain or having a fit. This is far from an exact science and comes with responsibility that is concerning. Based on my observations medication can be increased, though the decision to do so and the amount of the increase are thankfully not decisions I have to make. Today there have been signs of discomfort and now the driver is bleeping as it appears to be blocked somewhere, though after a couple of examinations I can find no evidence of it. The nurse has been to refill the ...
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