The sun shone, having no alternative, on the nothing new



The usual mix of ups, downs, highs and lows.  The difficulties of understanding people and the difficulty of getting across an equivalent understanding of oneself. Only direct speaking, however shocking, seems to to work. Even then, it seems, some things are open to misinterpretation and misunderstanding. I strive to survive. For reasons I know not why.

I love this song. Appropriately it haunts my days and my nights. It seems to encapsulate both beauty and danger; the most exquisite combination on the path to damnation. I like the broken words.

 The track is the just-released Afrodeutsche remix of 'Day Dreaming' from Marie Davidson's rather wonderful album 'Working Class Woman' from last year.

[The title of this blog is stolen from Samuel Beckett, from the opening of the novel 'Murphy'  ]

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular Posts

Love, Poetry and Revolution - Tuesday 25th March 2025

Image
After a long period of stasis, I have just completed the first step in changing our house and garden to meet the needs of us all.  The first step is converting our garden into a usable space for socialising and hosting gatherings (maybe with food if guests are lucky!) I'm on the verge of starting a project to convert our garage into a combined music room, library, and guest bedroom. It's long been a dream of mine to have a library and a music room, and this dream is now almost a reality.   You might ask why I didn't start this sooner? The overarching reason is that being E's carer, with all that entailed, it was almost impossible (for a long time) to muster the energy or positivity needed to make such big changes. Not only that, some of these changes would have been impossible whilst E was in her hospital bed. Getting to the point where I could even imagine there was a future for me was a very long process involving pain, upheaval, and a lot of counselling.  I need t...
Read more

Love, Poetry and Revolution -Thursday 24th August 2023

Image
It's been a while since my last post, longer than I anticipated when I decided I didn't need to post daily. Since then, which was a little over a week ago, a lot has happened though quite a lot of it can't appear here. Work has been especially busy as my work on the project is coming to an end.  Unusually, design uncertainties are increasing rather than decreasing as things wind down, which means I am doubly busy with new stuff as well as trying to ensure I wrap up and tidy all my documentation. There's been lots of monitoring activity keeping me busy while I get to grips with the joys of SDR.  It's opened up a world of possibilities that inevitably come with new challenges including the need for better antenna or better-sited (higher, outdoor) antenna and RF filters on top of the RF amplifiers I've also required. The antenna issues are especially challenging when I'm in Liverpool, given the 'temporary' nature of my presence.  When I'm away I thi...
Read more

Tales From The Crypt - Thursday 1st December 2022

Image
The first day of December!  I'm not quite sure where November went, but it seemed to pass quickly.  The countdown to you-know-what begins. Today is a very special day: the day that Q gives her inaugural lecture. We're all going to get dressed up for the occasion, which begins with (non-alcoholic) drinks, followed by the lecture, and then a sit-down meal. We'll sit with the Vice-Chancellor and his wife for the meal, so I shall be on my best behaviour. Apart from the momentous event occurring today, it's also a day tinged with sadness.  Today would have been a close friend's birthday, but sadly he died far too young. He is much missed. There seems to be an 'end of term' feeling in the air today, even though I have at least two weeks of work left. In that spirit, Q and I went out for lunch as she took a break from work. An afternoon of comings and goings led up to the time when son #1 and I, suited and booted, headed across the road to meet Q, her mum and daugh...
Read more

Lockdown Diary - Wednesday 21st April 2021

Image
What marks today as different from yesterday?  I'm a day older, certainly. The weather doesn't seem as bright.  In all other ways it started off the same, though. I noticed that there is more external bruising visible on my abdomen. I guess that's part of the process of my body repairing itself. Either that or someone's been kicking seven shades of shit out of me in my sleep. Another the letter. This is exciting: one of the carers yesterday said she nearly tripped on the front door mat.  It is looking rather knackered and is breaking up, so I ordered a new one which should be coming today. Just in time for the old one to be taken away by the bin men tomorrow. Successful delivery into a communications vacuum. I plan to go for a brief walk this afternoon and see how that goes. I must admit I don't feel like I'm recovering as fast as I'd expected and may well get in touch with my GP tomorrow. Early afternoon my sister called to check how I was and for a catch u...
Read more

Lockdown Diary - Saturday 28th March 2020

Image
Been shopping for the first time since last weekend and only the second time I've been out in a week - went for a run on Monday.  Despite good intentions, work has kept me so busy during the days that I've not even managed to squeeze in a walk the rest of the week: by the time I've stopped work it's been getting dark and, to my shame, I couldn't be arsed. Next week, I've promised myself I'll do better. Gonna put something in my work Outlook calendar each day so I do some walking. (I have been exercising every day though: press-ups and weights which is better than nowt, I guess) Did my first Zoom-hosted Yoga class on Thursday evening, which was an experiment by our Yoga teacher.  It was successful, though very odd to be adopting the tree pose in the living room while watching it on the laptop.  This is going to start in earnest next week, so it'll be back to Yoga at 10am on Monday, except no need to leave the house first. Zoom is fast becoming th...
Read more