Into the nothingness of scorn and noise

[Monday 5th November 2018]


Between me, myself and I

[Title is a quote from 'I Am' by John Clare]

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular Posts

Love, Poetry and Revolution - Monday 25th November 2024

Image
As things progress for E, the level of stress we are all experiencing has increased. Stress tends to creep up on you unnoticed until it overwhelms you.   Often, it takes someone else to spot the signs of increasing stress. It's getting to the level where I need to take action for my own sanity. My sons are also stuck and struggling to move on with their lives, which is not something E would ever have wanted.  There are some changes which we've been resisting but which I now must consider. It's not ideal, but when E came out of the hospital some two years ago the prognosis was not good and it seemed that, for such a short time, it would be best for E to spend her remaining days at home.  Two years later the downside of that decision is painfully clear.  After the next palliative care visit, at which I'll discuss all the above, I will begin to set the wheels in motion to change things. It will probably take a while, and given how E has been lately, it may never happen.  T
Read more

Natalie Prass versus Napalm Death

Image
In order to keep up with the stream of new albums so far this year I recently listened to Natalie Prass and Napalm Death whilst carrying some “brain-largely-not-required” chores.  One thing I generally find difficult is multi-tasking where music is concerned. Very rapidly music gains my full attention and then spreads its tendrils to the pleasure and motor centres of my brain, but the chores were simple enough that the music remained to the fore and the jobs got done. Enough on the idiosyncrasies of my wiring… So, Natalie and the ‘Death – quite a contrast – and not just because Nat’s (hope she doesn’t mind the undeserved familiarity) album is her debut whilst the Nap’s album is their nth – how did they fare I hear you cry? Thanks to the glowing and unanimous praise heaped on ‘Natalie Prass’ – for example ‘a gem of a heartbreak album’ (Observer), 8/10 Uncut – it had to be worth a listen.  Sadly, it didn’t live up to my expectation based on the reviews: the musical settings a
Read more

I’ve forgotten more than I remember….

Image
…which is probably just as well. Apropos of absolutely nothing, some random misfiring of synapses prompted me to give another airing to “Hermit of Mink Hollow”, Todd Rundgren’s first 100% solo album on which he plays all the instruments and sings all the vocals (1972's "Something/Anything?" fails to qualify as his first 100% solo effort because one of the 4 sides is a live-studio effort featuring assorted musicians and backing singers.) The album was released in 1978 and is named after a valley near Woodstock, New York, where Todd set up a recording studio and recorded this album. Like all of Todd’s solo albums post-1973’s“Todd” double album, there are a couple of seriously duff tracks but in spite of that it’s probably the most consistently good album he’s recorded after the creative peak of the early 1970’s.    The album – at least in its vinyl form – was split into “The Easy Side” and the “The Difficult Side” – though I can’t decide if that’s a joke: tracks on
Read more

Lockdown Diary - Saturday 27th March 2021

Image
Did all the usual Saturday morning things, with son #3 accompanying me shopping. Diversions, diversions.  The day started quite sunny and so I hung the washing out, though as the loads progressed the amount of sun reduced until there was none. Only the wind, given the temperature was nothing to write home about, was making any inroads into drying said washing. Whilst meditating late morning, I was disturbed by what sounded like the piston engines of a heavy-ish propeller plane. Sure enough when I looked out of the window there was a Dakota in D-Day RAF markings heading south-east.  It's a rare sound these days, so I had to look but as it disappeared from view, but then returned to meditation. During a conversation with a friend I discovered it had come from White Waltham and a quick bit of research on the net showed that it had departed White Waltham that morning (in the company of another) en-route to Lydd airfield in Kent. Around lunchtime I had a call from my father-in-law, the
Read more

Love, Poetry and Revolution - Thursday 14th November 2024

Image
For about a week, maybe more, I've had a cold.  It's one of those colds that refuses to go quickly. I have shared it widely, unintentionally, though of course, I may not be the source of all the colds, there are so many about. I'm not here to write about my cold, though. It's a lead-in to something more pernicious. Accompanying the cold, especially as it slowly fades, I've had a bad headache. Initially, I thought it was cold-related, but I've come to believe it's a physical manifestation of stress - a topic that opens a crate of cans of worms. The stress I'm experiencing is probably the result of several things I'm anxious about. I had considered listing the things I thought were at the root of it, and then deciding whether they belong in the category of things I can control or cannot control. Instead, I've decided to dig deeper and write about it in the hope that writing it down helps control it and maybe it helps more widely.  I've always b
Read more